20 Awesome 80’s Toys Every Kid Begged Their Parents For

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Are you 35 and older? If so, good. This article’s for you, because you remember the 80’s. More specifically, those super-cool 80’s toys. Unlike today’s millennial spoiled brat kids who have so much entertainment that they can’t appreciate anything. We 80’s kids absolutely loved our toys because, well, that’s all we had. After school or hanging with our friends on the weekend, we didn’t have Internet, we didn’t have access to non-stop gaming and mobile devices. All we had was Teddy Ruxpin, the Cabbage Patch Kids, a Fisher-Price cassette player, and the be-all-and-end-all of before bed entertainment – Lite Brite. Yes, we loved our toys. That, or we begged the shit out of our parents to get them for us. Since it’s that time of year again, that time where kids beg their parents for toys they want until their ears bleed (aka: Christmas), let’s take a three and a half decade look back at some of the coolest toys from the 80’s.
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Teddy Ruxpin

80’s kids were famous for having imaginary friends that’d talk to them. So you can imagine how many kids shit their pants with excitement when they got a Teddy Ruxpin – a bear that actually talked to you. Mind you it had a very limited vocabulary, so the conversations weren’t that deep or philosophical. Still, kids absolutely lost their minds for this talking stuffed bear.
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Fisher-Price Cassette Player

I know, like, big whoop now. But what was so cool about the Fisher-Price cassette player was that it allowed kids to play with what otherwise, was only equipment meant for adults. Essentially, it was the ‘pen in the mouth’ equivalent of mom’s cigarette, except for music.
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Garfield Stuffed Animals

Garfield was to the 80’s, what Grumpy Cat is to today (well, last year anyway). Garfield was the sardonic cat that had his own cartoon show that every kid watched every Saturday morning. So when they came out with a plush version of him, you better believe every kid was shitting their pants. Sorry, that’s the 2nd time I mentioned pants shitting. I think I ate something bad this morning as my stomach’s a bit off..
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Fisher-Price Medical Kit

Who didn’t love playing doctor when they were a kid? Especially little boys on little girls. I know I did. I had a blast trying to diagnose my friend’s illnesses, and pretend to make them feel better with this Fisher-Price Medical Kit. I remember even filling the pill bottle dispenser with my mom’s meds, which ended up giving my friends the runs. Ok, ok… I’ll stop.
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Casey the Talking Robot

Casey the cassette playing talking robot was the closest thing to having a real robot any kid could have. So he was a must-have for sure.
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Care Bears

Another toy based off of a hit kid’s cartoon series, Care Bears were an essential part of every kids stuffed animal collection.
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Cabbage Patch Kids Dolls

These dolls were so frickin’ popular for some crazy reason, that they were actually banned from schools. As I remember every kid in class had one – and when the teacher made us put them in the back with our coats and boots – there were mass brawls when class ended and it was time to collect.
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Garbage Pail Kids Cards

Boy, as I look back now, these things were ridiculous. They were cards, and stickers that came with gum, that, I guess, made fun of the before-mentioned Cabbage Patch Kids Dolls. Not sure why I liked these so much. Oh, I know why… they had one of a kid sitting on the toilet. Speaking of which…
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Little Tikes Kitchen Sets

You had to have some rich-ass parents to get one of these replica kitchen sets. I mean, they were about as useless as an ashtray on a motorcycle as you couldn’t cook shit on them. Still, they were the Mercedes-Benz in the garage of every kid in the neighborhood.
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Lite-Brite

“Lite Brite, Lite Brite, turn on the magic of colored lights!”. That jingle from the commercial is still ringing in my ears. Just like my whining for this colorful toy is, in my parents’.
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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Michelangelo, Raphael, Donatello, Leonardo… a bunch of ninja fighting turtles named after famous painters (I think). These figurines were a must-beg for, as the TV series from which they were created from was must-see TV for every kid.
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Big Wheel

Mom and Dad had a ride. So you had to have a ride too. It’s just elementary why every kid would beg the shit out of his or her parents for this one.
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View-Master

This was the 80’s version of Instagram. Except the pictures you loaded into the viewfinder were of none of your friends, or were even anything that like-able. Actually that’s not true. I remember having a Superman image wheel and would click myself to sleep every night.
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Snoopy Sno-Cones Machine

Now here was an actual toy that’d let you cook. Mind you, it only made slushies. But as a kid, that’s all I ever wanted to eat anyway.
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He-Man Action Figures

I remember once bringing my He-Man action figure to school, dropping him on the gravel in the baseball diamond, and watching his chest burst open, cracking into little pieces everywhere. I don’t know why I shared that with you. I guess cause it still hurts. That’s how much I loved these toys.
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Transformers

Do you know how many parents thought their kids had Tourettes as they tried to mimic with their mouths the transforming sounds the Transformers made when they transformed? I know mine did. That’s why I was in Dr. Greenspan’s office every Tuesday after school.
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My Little Pony

I never wanted one of these. They were made for stupid girls and I’m a boy. Gee, 35 years later and I still think girls are stupid. Next…
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G.I. Joe Action Figures

Now that’s more like it. An action figure of a boy made for boys, who came with guns, dressed in camo, and sharp pointy parts that are like, totally banned today.
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Speak & Spell

Sure, this machine sounded like it was possessed by the devil when you punched in key words for it to say. But that’s what was so great about it. Speak & Spell = Devil Machine.
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Star Wars Action Figures

Of course no toy list is complete without these. The Star Wars figures from the 80’s literally fetch you hundreds of thousands of dollars on eBay these days. They were that popular. I even remember how my mom yanked my hard-to-get-because-it-was-always-sold-out Darth Vader action figure from my hands, and threatened to drop it down the elevator shaft because I was being bad. I actually shit my pants that day. Just like I’m about to do today…
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